Tripp
Like many people in the town where I live, I
was raised by Christian parents. Every time the church doors were open my
family was there. For as far back as I can remember, I knew that Jesus had
died to save me from my sins. I thought for a long time that I was "born a
Christian." I am so glad that I now know I am born again!
When I was
around the age of thirteen, I started hanging around some people that would
have very negative impact on me. I began dabbling in pornography and developed
a lustful thought life. This would prove to be the trap that Satan set for me
and I would battle this addiction for the next five years of my life.
I soon led a double life.
During the week at school and church I appeared to have it all together. I said
the right things, did the right things, and looked the part of a devoted
follower of Christ. At home however, when I was all alone, I became a very
different person. Pornography became a need that I had to fulfill and my
"so called friends" were more than happy to pass me a magazine or a
movie.
My Christian
friends had no idea about the lie I was living, but the Holy Spirit convicted
me day and night. The lessons I had learned in Sunday school, youth bible
study, pastor's sermons, and most importantly, the lessons my parents had
taught me ran through my mind constantly. I reached a point at the
age of seventeen that I knew I had to either turn to Jesus or face a life of
sexual addiction and lies. Around this time one of my best friends, who grew up
in an alcoholic family, gave his heart to Jesus. I could tell his life was
radically different. He knew about my pornography problem and the fact that I
also claimed to be a Christian. One day, as we were preparing to go
hunting, he asked me a question that would change my life.
He said, "Tripp
for as long as I have known you, you have claimed to be a Christian. I have
only been a Christian a short time but, I read in the bible that when Jesus
comes into your heart that all things become new. I also read that your life
bears good fruit. I just wondered if you think your life bears good fruit. Are
you sure that if you died tonight you would go to heaven?" I was floored.
Who was he to question my salvation? I grew up in church, I knew who
Jesus was! Slowly the Holy Spirit began to speak to me through my friends
words. I fell under deep conviction and knew that the Lord was speaking to me
and I had to respond. Thanks to my Christian home I knew exactly what to do. I
prayed to receive Jesus as my Lord and savior. The burden that lifted from me
that night was indescribable! The desire to fulfill my lustful desires
left me and the desire for the Lord and his word grew stronger.
Eleven
years have passed since that day and my life, while not perfect has never been
the same. I still have to battle sinful desires and there are times when I
still fail but, now I ask my heavenly father to forgive me and to help me turn
away from my sin. The best part is when he looks at me he sees the blood
of Jesus applied! In closing I would like to share a verse that has
become dear to me as the years go by Proverbs 22:6 Train up a child in the way
he should go and when he is old he will not depart from it. Praise God
this is so true! I am so thankful that my parents taught me about Christ
and brought me up in church. Even though I didn't have
a relationship with Christ till I was eighteen, the spiritual
truths I learned helped me to understand and recognize the Lord's calling
on my life.
Tripp Speer